Most of us recognize
the continuing escalation of violence
around us, due to intolerance, and many of us blame it on
somebody else. Parents teach their children, all the time, and
when one of us displays "road rage," while our child is in the
car, we teach a brand new skill set.
Although, road rage is inappropriate behavior, at any time, and
can get you killed, most children who are exposed to it, will
duplicate the actions of their parents, when they are old enough
to drive.
So the first step, is to set an example and, possibly, use some
of these ideas, for yourself. Studies show that anger causes
atherosclerosis, the build-up of plaques in the arteries, that
is a major factor in developing high blood pressure, heart
disease, heart attack, and premature death.
Also, during a "temper tantrum," adrenaline and blood pressure
levels rise beyond normal. This behavior is more dangerous to
parent's bodies due to the normal "wear and tear" already
existing.
Now, you may be convinced that anger can kill you, but let's
look at one more factor. You could hurt someone else, find
yourself in prison, or get yourself killed due to inciting
violence against others. There are other people, who are having
difficulty dealing with anger management too.
Back to our children: All children need exercise and they are
naturally full of energy. Look at any other species, and you
will see the same behavior. Should we drug our dogs, cats, and
parrots, when they display youthful exuberance?
Children have to run, jump, and shout. So let them play in the
back yard, in a park, and get them involved in sports, Yoga,
dance, or martial arts. You will never regret letting your child
enjoy life, constructively learn in the process, and just be a
kid.
For all of us, there is a time to be quiet and a time to shout.
Children need years to learn this, so let's keep them active in
the process. Keep them away from the television, Internet, and
video games, except for "rainy days." Coloring books, board
games, and reading are also good activities for rainy days.
A heavy bag is a great tool for letting anger out. You and your
child can use it together. You can learn to punch and kick it,
for the aerobic benefits, as well. If you have a friend who is a
boxer or martial artist, you could get some pointers. After just
a 20-minute session, I guarantee you, and your child, will have
dealt with anger - there will be little, if any, left.
Teach your child forgiveness, through your own example. I am not
asking you to let people "walk all over you." However, let
grudges go; life is really too short to keep a feud going.
You can also control your child's "circle of friends," just by
getting him or her involved in, group activities such as: League
sports, dance, yoga, or martial arts. The parents who have their
children in these activities want the best for them and are
willing to sacrifice their time, or money, to get it.
This will keep your child busy, happy, and active, with a
pre-selected crowd of friends, who have parents that care. This
is a "win - win" situation and well worth the investment.
This is not to say that every child you run into, at these
functions, will be perfect, but in the above mentioned
activities, all of them are structured, adult-supervised, and
rules for behavior are in place. This form of organization
becomes a habit, your child will follow these guidelines, and
bring them home.
Here is another idea that will help. Have your child take care
of a pet or a plant, every day. Children love to care for
animals or plants, but they still need supervision. The result
of this will be, your child learns compassion.
Compassion will keep anger "in check" every time.
By Paul Jerard, is a co-owner/director of Yoga teacher training at
Aura Wellness Center. He has been a certified Master Yoga
teacher since 1995. He is a master instructor of martial arts.
He teaches Yoga, martial arts, and fitness to children, adults,
and seniors. Recently he wrote: Is Running a Yoga Business Right
for You? For Yoga students, who may be considering a new career
as a Yoga teacher. http://www.yoga-teacher-training.org
